October was “Let’s Talk Month,” a time when Advocates for Youth and the Oklahoma State Department of Health (OSDH) Child and Adolescent Health Division encourage parent/child communication about sexuality. But it’s not only a topic that should be discussed in October, parent’s should strive to maintain a dialogue with their children throughout the year. Developing an open dialogue with your children makes it easier to discuss the tough topics, like sexuality.

“We recognize that parents are the best sexuality educators for their children and they want to do a good job but may not always understand how to explain things. Studies have shown that when asked, children say they do want sex education from their parents or legal guardians because they trust them,” said OSDH Child & Adolescent Health Director James Marks.

“You can be an ‘askable’ parent, a caring parent, and a wise counselor by explaining to your children some basic messages about individual growth and change and how everyone is unique,” Marks emphasized. “Discuss that everybody’s body is private and deserves respect. Explain that sexuality is a beautiful gift that should be handled wisely.”

Below are a few ideas on how you can begin to open dialogue about human sexuality and your family’s values and beliefs:

• Listen more than talk.
• Focus on behaviors, not persons.
• Negotiate and compromise or at least consider other views.
• Encourage an open exchange of ideas. Foster your child’s decision-making ability.
• Encourage and receive questions.
• Admit if you don’t know the answer then find out the answer and share it.
• Share your family values and beliefs with your children.
• Explore feelings.
• Show agreement and support often.
• Keep a sense of humor.
• Be clear about expectations.
• Sponsor a parent-child communication-training program at your school.
• Encourage your school board member, administrators, teachers, nurse, and counselors to attend training programs in child/adolescent health and sexuality.
• Start a "make a date" campaign and schedule family time to sit down and talk together.

For more suggestions, visit AdvocatesForYouth.org, which contains an online guidebook filled with organizing tips and activities that promote parent-child communication about sexuality.

For additional information and resources, contact the OSDH Child and Adolescent Health Division, Maternal and Child Health Service at 405-271-4471 and ask about adolescent health programs.